Cephalaspidomorphii

A friend of mine said to me once… you know what; most of the people in our course took BS Bio only because their parents wanted them to… For a few moments, I’ve given it a thought.

Back when I was choosing a course to apply to in the UP form, I had my mom beside me. However, she never really said something about what I should pick. Her only words were "Just pick the ones you’d really be putting yourself into" and "are you sure about this?" after I’ve finished filling up the form, and then an expressionless "okay" when I said yes.

BAA was actually my first choice because, just like my brother, I wanted to have a pretty decent job when I graduate. Unfortunately, I got my second choice, BS Bio.

In time, the "unfortunately" turned into a "luckily" when I realized in my first year that my knowledge of math was not enough to meet the demands of BAA.

And so I thought, maybe it was destiny. Destiny… destiny… destiny… I probably heard it echo a million times in my head… destiny.

My dilemma started when my friend asked me, "how about you? Why did you choose BS Bio?" A lot of people have asked me that question before, but this was the only time I’ve thought about it deeply… deeply… deeply into the core of my head, and probably into the core of my heart. Well, just to give a quick answer, I said "I want to be a doctor." It was a standard answer coming from a biologist… "I want to be a doctor." Darn! Is this all the reason I have?

Like day dreaming, I went back to the day I was choosing courses in the form. I realized that I was lucky because I was given a privilege by my mom (even my brother, I guess). They both gave me the power of CHOICE. However, did I waste this privilege by choosing BS Bio? Certainly not! I remembered for a fact that it took me almost 3 days to think about what to take. Each of the 4 courses I picked, I know I’ve given enough time… Enough time to think about where it will take me, what jobs will it land me, what will my future be, and what reason do I have to take it. I know for a fact that I was enjoying choosing those four; I know I wanted them, I know that which ever will be given to me, I can be happy.

I reflected on the reasons behind these 4 choices. The easiest to remember was my first choice (BAA) because it was actually the shortest one I pondered on prior to filling up the form. I wanted to be a business man, I want to be rich… those were the 2 main "themes" for taking up BAA. This must be why I never got the course: the reason was shallow. So, how about BS Bio? "I want to be a doctor" was only part of the reason, I swear. I’m positive that this was the course I’ve thought of DEEPEST. However, because of my attitude of forgetting carelessly the important stuffs happening into my life, I think I’m doomed to fail to recover my very reason why I ever took this course. Oh Crap!

I think that starting now, each time I’d say "I want to be a doctor," somehow I’d be lying to myself. Until that day that I remember the very cause of me taking BS Bio, I will never stop thinking about it. Never! I am enjoying after all… wahahahahahahaahaha!